The Roots of My New Life - Optimist's Guide to Divorce
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The Roots of My New Life

I’ve discovered that the community of women I met and relied on during my divorce has become the foundation on which I’ve built my post-divorce life. These women have become the people I turn to when I’m in a pinch or looking for someone to have dinner with, especially since I don’t have family close by. Impromptu get-togethers has became a new normal I’ve been able to count on and look forward to.


When your divorce is behind you, your life will get easier in many ways. One of the major stresses—the divorce itself—will be over. Soon there will be benchmarks where you catch yourself thinking, “This must mean I am really moving on,” whether it’s a first kiss with a new man, buying a home on your own, or even something mundane like putting up a shelf on your own in your office. With each victory big or small, you believe in yourself that much more.


For me, the friendships formed during my divorce have long outlived the divorce process itself. The women who helped me through it are still the ones I turn to. And as I face new challenges, like buying a new house this past summer or surviving a lover who broke my heart, I know with certainty that an optimistic attitude and a supportive circle of friends have made all the difference.


The journey I started the day I was pronounced divorced by a judge continues as I grow in each new relationship; take on everything from managing my financial portfolio to tightening a loose toilet handle; and look for the good in people, places, and experiences. I know the roots that have been growing these past few years are stronger than I ever imagined possible.

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